Chapter 6

Written by: Sumanda Maritz

The tomato red colour drained from his face as I stood there squashing his hand as hard as I could. As his colour changed to a sickly yellow, I allowed myself to broaden my smile into a grin. “We’ve met before, Nadeem. You hit me at the party and we go to the same anger management meetings. I wonder if Sheila knows how you flirted with the lady that served us tea?”

***

I woke up in a hospital, my neck in a brace and my whole body covered with aches. The fogginess in my mind cleared slowly. The bastard jumped me! So maybe I shouldn’t have told him how I would console his wife. So what? It was the truth.

Lying in that crappy hospital bed for a week finally gave me some perspective. If you’re trussed up like a turkey you can’t stab, hit or bash anyone. It did give me time to think. I realised I did not need anger management. I needed control, planning and forethought. And now I had it. That bastard Nadeem was going to pay for this. And he had no idea that I was coming for him. Any of them.

***

I started out slow. Followed Nadeem around all of the time thanks to my unemployed status. Feroz fired me. But never mind he was next on my list with that little bitchy intern Adi just after that. I decided to work my list backwards. Starting with Nadeem and ending with that foul mouthed little shit that used to pick on me in grade school.

Sheila’s husband made it almost too easy. The man exploded on a regular basis and just as I thought, he had an eye for the ladies. So I added to his frustrations. I put screws in front of his tyres. Ah, you should have seen that squishy red face when he pulled away and ended up with three flat tyres! 

I bought a camera after that. I wanted more permanent memories.

I nicked his car’s brake line then had to follow him for several kilometres to get the pictures of him kicking his own car door in when he rammed into a bus. Bird poop that I collected fell on him just as he prepared to walk into the office building for an important meeting. The stuff dripped from his hair down to his shoes and completely ruined his nicest suit. Hey, I collected a lot and added a few extras!

And it just got better with every single thing I did to him. That tomato face got squishier with each misfortune. I even had to buy an external hard drive just to store all the photographs of him. It gave me many pleasant evenings to look through them as he came apart.

At last, I had him primed for the finale. He was back at the anger management meeting. Apparently he was now under court order to attend every meeting. That worked well for me.